I’m not a person that does New Year’s resolutions, but I do like to reflect on the past year and set intentions for the coming year. This post is coming a bit later than I had planned, but sometimes shit happens and you just gotta roll with it 😀
2023 was a really full-on year for us. It started with preparing for our big move from San Francisco, California to Melbourne, Australia, and all the things that came with it. In January, I gave notice at my job. We packed up our house in February. In March, we arrived in Melbourne and I started my new job. By June, we felt pretty settled both in terms of our home space and our jobs. We have reconnected with family and friends in Australia, and made new friends. We’ve now established ourselves in Australia and we’re building a life here.
In 2024, I think that I am finally ready to emerge fully out of the protective cocoon I wrapped myself in the last few years during the pandemic. This is some scary shit, but I am ready for it. Table stakes for me include regular exercise, meditation, and journaling, three practices that have formed the foundation of good mental and physical health for me over the past eight years or so. It has been life-changing. As part of my new year reflection and intention setting, I’ve been thinking about how I can go next level with my practices. I’m going to focus on three areas: opening to all the joy I can find, making friends with my fears, and leaning hard into creativity.
First, the joy. In my personal journal, I have included a gratitude list, and I feel like I do a pretty good job of incorporating gratitude into my life on the regular. If I’m being honest, though, the daily gratitude list could use a refresh. It almost feels like I should only be including BIG and IMPORTANT stuff on the list, but as a result it has started to become repetitive. Thinking about this sparked a memory of a podcast that I listened to not long ago that really inspired me in the moment. It was the Ten Percent Happier podcast episode with the poet Ross Gay, who wrote The Book of Delights and Inciting Joy. I think I’m naturally a cheerful person, but I do have a tendency to brood and sometimes to spiral. It has taken years of practice, but I now know that I can make a conscious choice to focus attention on things that make me happy and bring me joy, that lift me up rather than wallowing or spiraling on the things that bring me down or make me feel bad about myself (looking at you, Inner Critic). This month, I decided to try something new; I have been listing things that bring me joy. And you know what? I fucking love it. Give me all the joy!
Next, my fears. I would like to find a way to more easily coexist with the fear and anxiety that seem to be my constant companions. I started meditating eight years ago to reduce my fear and anxiety, I guess thinking it was a way I could get rid of them? I’ve learned that meditation is not so much about getting rid of fear and anxiety but providing tools to help process these and other difficult emotions so that I don’t suffer so much. Let’s face it, fear and anxiety are normal parts of life. The trick is not to let them take over. I recognize that my fear and my anxiety will always be with me, but that doesn’t mean that I have to let them rule me. Joy and happiness and love are also always with me. I can choose how I flow.
So how can I make friends with my fears instead of letting them hold me back? I’ve decided to try running towards the things that scare me and embracing them instead of avoiding them. I will double down on my three core practices to help me do this, and it is already working. For example, I have been finding the past few weeks that I am having a lot more fun (and a lot less dread) at work. I attribute this to several things. One, I have been recognizing when my inner critic starts laying into me and have been able to shut it down with self-compassion and reality – thank you, mindfulness practice! Two, when I notice that I am feeling some strong emotion about something, I have started writing about it in the moment – in my personal journal, a blank email window or Word document on my laptop, a scrap of paper, whatever. Something about getting the words out of my head and down on paper (whether real or virtual) is just super helpful to me to stay grounded and rooted in reality and keep from spiraling into a place that holds me back. These small steps add up and makes it easier for me to find the courage to embrace my fears and step out of my comfort zone. And that, my friends, is so fun!
Last but not least, creativity. I really want to put more focus into my creativity this year, especially sewing and making things in general. Last year I didn’t sew much until almost the end of the year, and when I did it felt great! I also found that it was easier to tap into my creativity when I set things up to help it flow. My partner and I spent a good chunk of our two-week holiday break on our creative hobbies and it just made us both so happy. I want to bring that energy into 2024 and make time to make things.
I think I might be ready for this now. Let’s go 2024!
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